Is it Too Much, Haymitch?
by King Paige Allen
Summary: OneShot. Katniss has some womanly troubles in the arena and takes it out on Peeta... I own nothing. Reviews!


**So, I feel really crappy right now, and decided to take it out on Peeta and Haymitch. Lol. Just a dumb little thing I wrote because. Poking fun at the series will ensue here. If that offends you, turn back now. Okay. Team Peeta. Here goes.  
>Enjoy. <strong>

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><p>Peeta did not mind Katniss's forceful kissing, but Katniss was not wholeheartedly in it.<p>

Now that Peeta's leg was less likely to fall off and his blood was no longer poisoned, he was able to move a bit more. He was still weak, but could walk short distances on his leg. This helped when food needed to be gathered or when he needed to go to the bathroom. Katniss would never forget the first time she'd had to help Peeta pee. He didn't seem to mind, though, which upset her even further.

"I love you, Peeta," Katniss breathed. Peeta nodded enthusiastically and clasped a hand around the back of her neck, pulling her closer. She wriggled into his lap, hoping this would grab the attention of the people in the Capitol. She watched out of the corner of her eye for a small parachute to flutter down, but none did. She felt bad using Peeta like this, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

She pulled away and looked him straight in the eye and slid one hand up his abs. He gasped and held his breath, eyes half closed. He wrapped one hand around her wrist, holding it still. "Katniss..." he whispered. She gave a small smile and leaned in again, hand still on his stomach. He was warm.

Peeta put one hand on her lower back and pushed her into him, but she gasped. Katniss quickly side-dived off him and curled up on the wall next to him, legs clenched tightly together. Peeta's mouth fell open. "Are- what did I do? Are you okay?" She gritted her teeth and tried to smile. "Yeah, uh," she stammered. Peeta raised an eyebrow when she curled further into herself. "You sure?" he asked quietly. She nodded again and stood up, wincing.

She motioned for Peeta to hand up her bow- there was no way she could bend down now- and he did, and she said tightly, "I'll, uh, be back in a second. I just wanna... I heard something. Uh, stay here," she said, moving toward the mouth of the cave before he could get up to stop her. He held a hand up. "Wait!" Katniss smiled and laughed, "Don't worry! I'll be fine." She waved him off and he sat back. "Hugs not drugs, stay in school, take your vitamins, eat your vegetables," she rambled on. Peeta raised an eyebrow again.

Katniss stomped through the river, not caring if Cato or anyone heard her. She was ready to take them all out, right now. She made sure she was far enough away so Peeta wouldn't hear her, and then raised her face to the sky. She angrily shook her bow and growled, "Is a box of tamps too much to ask for, people?" She pointed back to the cave. "Did you _see_ that? I can't even make out with Peeta because of this! Just a few, please!"

She threw her arms up angrily and then stomped back to the cave, throwing herself down on the floor. Peeta, an apple slice in his hand, quietly asked, "You okay?" She glared at him and laid her head back down. "_Peachy_," she growled sarcastically. Peeta held his hands up, offended. "What's your problem?" he asked.

Oh, no, he didn't.

She bolted upright and crawled slowly toward him on her hands and knees. Any other time he'd welcome the action, but this just frightened him. "Katniss?" he asked, pushing himself away with his hands. She made a point of crossing her legs tightly then continuing. "Actually, my problem is being a girl." The venom in her tone increased with every word. Peeta watched cautiously. "When I take a breath, it feels like I'm being stabbed down _there_ forty times a second. I want to eat everything we don't _have_ here, everything you say makes me want to choke you out, and every time I take a step or blink I gush blood! So, yes, if you must know, that is my problem." She crossed her arms and leaned against the wall, satisfied.

Peeta started quietly. "Well, what are you supposed to do about it?" He put a comforting hand on her thigh. Her feet were near his, and her head was at the opposite end of the cave. "Nothing!" she wept. Peeta had no sisters, and his mother did not come to him for these things, so this was his first time around an emotionally unstable woman. "I tried to make one," Katniss cried, "but it didn't work! All they have here is grass and leaves! _Peeta!" _He flinched and rubbed her leg, hoping the mood would just stop. She sobbed into her hand quietly and Peeta watched out of the entrance to the cave, waiting for a parachute to come down so he could get it and let Katniss fix her issue.

He thought maybe the Capitol wanted a show. Maybe they wanted to be entertained with the starcrossed-lovers and Haymitch would not give Katniss her... womanly things until they got one. Peeta shifted down next to her and tucked her hair behind her ear and pulled the sleeping bag over them. She hid her face in her shirt. He wrapped a hand around her shoulders and pursed his lips, trying to think of what to say.

This would not end well. He rubbed her back and tried, "Um, it stops eventually, doesn't it?" Katniss screamed into his chest and he squeezed his eyes shut, thinking, _"Or not..."_

"Do you realize how many rabbits I've killed in my life?" Katniss asked. Peeta was stunned into silence. He shook his head. "No. I do not." Katniss pulled her head back and said matter-of-factly, "A lot. I've killed a lot of rabbits, Peeta. They never did anything to me! They fed my sister! And do you know what I did for them?" she asked. Peeta shook his head again, silent. "I _kill_ them, Peeta!" she shrieked, bursting into tears again. Peeta's face wrinkled up and he felt ready to cry himself.

She shook next to him and curled further into herself, then rolled on her back, clutching her stomach. "What can I do?" Peeta asked desperately. Katniss rolled back and forth on her back in the fetal position. Peeta watched her for a while, trying to think of what he could do, when it came to him. He had to make it look like he was sorry for her. He was, he really was, but it probably looked like he just wanted to get away from her. He grabbed her hand and pressed it to his cheek, then said sadly, "I'm sorry. If I could have it instead of you, I would."

Katniss looked up at him through teary eyes and sniffed. "You mean that?" she said, her voice breaking. Peeta nodded and kissed her palm and she broke into tears again. "I don't deserve you!" she wailed. Peeta nodded his head quickly. He looked deeply into her eyes, clutching her hand tighter to his chest. "No," he said. He paused dramatically after the word like men in soap operas do, then emphasized, "I don't deserve _you_."

Katniss smiled up at him and he leaned down for a kiss, glad to just have her stop crying. She sniffed and laid back, using the back of her hand to wipe off her nose. Peeta, noticing that no parachute had come down yet, brushed Katniss's hair back and mumbled just loud enough for the cameras to hear, "Don't know how I got so lucky."

Katniss shrieked and knocked heads with Peeta, who had leaned down for a kiss. She pointed frantically and Peeta stood up to retrieve the basket sitting outside the cave. He pulled the small blanket off the top and reached inside. There was a small box inside that Peeta picked up. It rattled, and Peeta didn't want to even guess what was inside. He handed the box to a cheeky Katniss and then reached inside for the other thing there.

It was a small plastic bag, and inside were orange earplugs.

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><p><strong>Bwahaha, this is how I felt today. Sometimes I want earplugs to ignore myself. Lol. Well, I hope that wasn't horrible. Just a dumb little thing I did. Lol. Let me know what you thought, I'm open to hear what you thought... unless you thought mean things. Keep that to yourself. Lol. Much love,<br>~Paige**


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